Core value · Kindness family
Gratitude
Appreciating what you already have
Also covers Appreciation and Thankfulness
What does gratitude mean as a core value?
Gratitude as a core value means making a habit of noticing and appreciating what’s good, and thanking the people and circumstances that helped you get where you are.
Noticing what’s good is a habit for you, and it colours how you see almost everything. A decent cup of coffee, a team that pulls together, a friend who called at the right moment: these don’t slide past unremarked. Appreciation is something you practise, as well as something you feel. It tends to make you better at thanking people, slower to take things for granted and more likely to find something worth keeping even in a disappointing year.
What does gratitude look like in practice?
- You send a thank-you note or message when someone has helped you, even in a small way.
- You start a team meeting by recognising what went well before turning to challenges.
- You pause at the end of the day to think about what you’re glad of.
- You credit the people who helped you when you’re praised for a success.
- You tell your family what you appreciate about them, as well as what needs doing.
When is gratitude overplayed?
Gratitude can become a way of silencing legitimate complaints, your own or other people’s. You tell yourself you should be thankful for a job that’s making you ill, or suggest that a struggling colleague should count their blessings. It can also stop you asking for what you deserve, like a pay rise. Healthy gratitude sits alongside honest dissatisfaction: you can appreciate what you have and still say clearly that something needs to change. One small habit is to pair each thing you’re grateful for with one thing you’d like to be different.
Often confused with
Gratitude vs Contentment
Contentment is being satisfied with life as it is. Gratitude is actively noticing and appreciating what’s good, and you can be grateful while still wanting more.
Gratitude vs Humility
Humility is keeping a modest, accurate view of yourself. Gratitude looks outwards, at the people and circumstances that helped you.
Gratitude vs Recognition
Recognition is being acknowledged for what you contribute. Gratitude is giving that acknowledgement, to people and to life in general.
Questions to sit with
- Who has helped you this year without being properly thanked?
- What do you take for granted that you’d miss most if it disappeared tomorrow?
- Where has gratitude made you accept something you should have challenged?
More values in Kindness
Warmth, gratitude and generosity towards others.
About the author
Matt Rutherford is a Career and Leadership Coach. The Values Finder is the same exercise he uses with his coaching clients. He also writes Stuff that MattRs, a weekly newsletter with practical ideas to help you think clearer and work better.
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